Bullies at School

Bullies at School

PROFILE ON BULLIES

The following are traits common to bullies:

  • They are concerned with their own pleasure rather than thinking about anyone else.
  • They want power.
  • They are willing to use other people to get what they want.
  • They feel hurt inside.
  • They find it difficult to see things from someone else’s perspective.

TIPS FOR HELPING CHILDREN DEAL WITH BULLIES

  • Teach your children early on to steer clear of youth with bullying behavior.
  • Teach your children to be assertive rather than aggressive or violent when confronted by a bully. Instruct them to walk away and get help from an adult in more dangerous situations. Practice various responses with your children through role-playing.
  • Teach your children to never defend themselves from bullies with a gun or other weapon.
  • Keep communication lines open with your children. Encourage your children to share information about school and school-related activities.
  • Pay attention to the following symptoms that may indicate your child is being bullied: withdrawal, abrupt lack of interest in school, a drop in grades, or signs of physical abuse.
  • If your child is a victim of bullying at school, inform school officials immediately. Keep your own written records of the names, dates, times, and circumstances of bullying incidents. Submit a copy of this report to the school principal.
  • Respond to your children’s concerns and fears with patience, love, and support.

WHAT CAN PARENTS OF THE BULLY DO?

  • MAKE IT CLEAR to your child that you take bullying seriously and do not tolerate such behavior in the future.
  • DEVELOP A CONSISTENT FAMILY RULES SYSTEM. When they follow the rules use praise and reinforcement. When they break the rules then use consistent, non-hostile, negative consequences.
  • SET A GOOD EXAMPLE FOR YOUR CHILD. If your child observes aggressive behavior by you, they are more likely to act aggressively toward other kids.
  • SPEND MORE QUALITY TIME WITH YOUR CHILD. Monitor and supervise your child’s activities. Know your child’s friends, where they spend their free time, and what they do with that free time.
  • Help your child DEVELOP LESS AGGRESSIVE AND MORE APPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR. When you see improved behavior, recognize and reward your child.
  • MAINTAIN CONTACT WITH YOUR CHILD’S SCHOOL. Support the school’s efforts to modify your child’s behavior. Frequent communication with teachers and administrators is important to find out how your child is doing in changing their behavior.
  • SEEK HELP from a mental health professional. Take bullying seriously. Children who bully increase their risk for engaging in other forms of antisocial behavior, such as juvenile delinquency, criminality, and substance abuse. Bullying behavior should be taken seriously.